Sometimes we go through phases in our life where we experience anxiety. You feel afraid of what people might think of you. Even if you logically know what others think doesn't matter, you feel as if it should. This feeling stops you from behaving and doing the things your best self would do.
To be able to let go of insecurities, you must be comfortable in your environment. You must be comfortable around the people you are with. You must be comfortable with yourself.
1. Find Comfort In Your Environment.
You might be able to sing or dance in the shower, but when you are out in public it scares you. Different environments trigger different personalities within you to come out.
Think about how you feel when you are out in public. Think about how you feel when you are at home. Now how would you feel in public if you treated it as if you were at home.
2. Find Comfort With The People Around You.
Think of when you take an elevator. If you are alone with a friend, you joke around, have a regular conversation. But if there's a stranger in the elevator, you become anti social. You find the nearest corner and hug it. You try to avoid eye contact because it feels awkward.
Socialize. Being in social situations will always feel awkward unless you've exchanged a few pieces of information with the other person or persons. You must find out a little bit about them and they should find out a little bit about you.
Remind yourself that everyone is generally thinking about themselves and their appearance. Under most situations, you can let go of your insecurities because everyone else also has them. It's not something that holds you back, but something which makes you relatable to others. When you allow yourself to be comfortable around other people, you express your inner self that resonates with them.
3. Find Comfort Within Yourself.
Find comfort in uncomfortable situations. If you expect yourself to accomplish extraordinary tasks, you must teach yourself to be comfortable under such circumstances. You can adopt a stoic personality where you suppress your discomfort and awkwardness but you let your positive emotions surface and flourish.
Open up and be your positive self. By finding comfort in your life your personality will fit in and stand out anywhere you go.
Your mind is like a maze. Whenever you have a problem the first thing which comes to mind is "What should I do?" You try to find an answer. A solution. A way out.
The answer is within your deeper self. You might look for advice or mentors, but ultimately you will decide based on your inner thoughts and beliefs.
Your body is made up of everything it consumes. You must provide it with all the essential resources for it to survive and thrive in your environment.
Food alters your state of consciousness, just like anything else you consume. Some foods might get you drowsy, others might get you tired. But if you know the right foods for your body, you can experience enhanced states of consciousness. As well as control when you experience them.
The right foods increase your awareness and widens your state of mind. It allows you to feel the present moment and gives you the ability to think with more clarity.
You can control which foods go into your body. Here's a list of the foods which should and shouldn't go in your body:
The first is reading body language, the second would be controlling or altering your own body language.
(More specific “skills” such as exact behaviors or techniques you can actually use and put into action can be found in the linked articles below.)
Body language is directly linked with your emotional states. If you are feeling good, it shows through your body language, as well as if you are feeling bad. Also, if you consciously change your behaviors and posture from happy to sad, or from sad to happy, it alters your emotional state. You can read more about Confident/Insecure, Happy/Sad body language on the article: Confident vs. Insecure Body Language.
There are also certain behaviors that will almost instantly alter your emotional state into feeling happy and charismatic, see those at: 11 Happiness Triggers You Can Use Right Now.
Here are the two skills:
You've had only one voice your whole life. It's time to change that. Confident speakers articulate their voice. They change their tone and style of speaking.
But you don't have time to focus on your voice every time you speak. Choosing which tone or style to use. It would clutter your thoughts and people wouldn't take you seriously. So how do you express your real self, while speaking in the confident voice people admire?
The answer is to maintain your voice. By doing voice training as well as regular voice check ups through out the day. You can have day to day conversations without seeming obsessed by a single quality of your personality.
You can train yourself and maintain a confident voice by reviewing a few of the following ideas and techniques:
Speaking with confidence allows others to better understand you and admire your ideas. Just by practicing a few of the previous techniques you can improve your voice and speak with confidence.
References & Further Reading:
Leadership consists of understanding where people want to go. Offering hope and the belief that you can lead them there. And being at the forefront to reach the goal.
Here's what you'll need to do
When you have no time to self-talk. When you have no time to retreat. When you are out and about. You can still rely on happiness triggers.
Just like the name suggests, happiness triggers are behaviors which trigger happiness. Some of these behaviors are natural, others are conditioned.
When you are walking in public, or in a face to face conversation, small actions can be used to trigger your state of happiness.
Here are a list of triggers which help build the different qualities of a happy person. From most subtle to most outstanding:
1. Tap yourself or an object.
Tapping gives you a sense of connection to the physical world. It helps you come back to reality if you are lost in your mind.
2. Wiggle your thumb.
I't playful and private. You don't bother those around you and you can imagine a smiling face on your thumb as it nods back and forth.
3. Snap Your Finger.
This can be silent or loud, depending on how hard you snap. You can lightly slide your fingers without making a sound and still feel the snap.
You already know this. People tell you all the time. It's mainstream advice. But it still applies.
Your body has two systems for control and communication. One is the nervous system. The other is the endocrine system, which releases chemical messengers called hormones. Hormones control responses such as growth, reproduction, metabolic rate, blood glucose levels, and salt and water balance. (Lynette Rushton)
Hydration allows the body to more effectively circulate these hormones. (Doug McGuff and John Little)
2. Eat Organic.
Eat organic fruits and vegetables to reduce toxic effects of pesticides on your brain, and also your thyroid and your sex hormones, which are very sensitive to the effects of low-level toxins. (Mark Hyman)
Click Here To Get 15% Off Organic, Healthy Foods.
It strengthens your cardiovascular system, reduces inflammation, increases neuroplasticity and balances hormones. (Mark Hyman)
People who have close personal relationships experience fewer health problems, live longer, and are less depressed and anxious. (John B. Arden)
Your immune system is fine tuned to respond to our social surroundings. Lonely people have high baselines levels of stress hormones and inflammation. (Jo Marchant)
Sleep has been shown to be crucial for certain genetic processes, protein synthesis, and myelin formation. Without myelin, the neurons do not fire efficiently. Sleep deprivation can also lead to weight gain, even after just one week, because of an increase in the production of the hormone ghrelin. Which promotes appetite for starchy, high-carbohydrate foods, sweets, and other high-calorie foods. (John B. Arden)
These are the 5 things which your health heavily relies on. Since we are striving for great health and long lives, take this as another reminder of the 5 timeless tips to improve your body and your health.
When you share any emotion, good or bad, with anyone else, love emerges. The negative emotions depreciate. And the positive emotions are enhanced.
“A stranger is just a friend you have yet to meet." - Unknown Author
We live in a world where people are constantly walking around in their own bubble. Thinking about their To-Do lists and worrying about their own problems. You see people with their eyes stuck on their phone screens, unaware of their surroundings. Surroundings full of opportunities and potential relationships. Eventually we grow insecure and lose confidence to straighten up and look into each other’s eyes.
But we are a bunch of humans interacting with each other and trying to feel good. An excuse to connect with others is to make them feel good. It is something which makes you a memorable and admirable person. Whether you do it by complimenting them or playfully teasing them. Even giving them a really good hug when they were expecting a mediocre one.
You should set out to turn strangers into friends. Here are 3 steps to create amazing connections:
1. Pull Them Into Your Life
Sometimes all you have to do is to lend a hand out. Literally, lend a hand out. Some people might feel scared, anxious, or unwelcomed. So lend a hand out and pull them into your life. Pull them into your group of friends and make them feel welcomed. We all have had the awkward moment where you feel like an outsider. You don’t know how to relate and feel shy. Notice when people are going through these emotions and lend a hand out.
2. Understand Them.
You should seek to understand their point of view, and their way of experiencing life. When someone is sharing their thoughts and experiences with you, nothing makes them feel more understood than your eye contact. People will care about you, because you care about them and what they have to say. Ask the right questions. Find out about their childhood, and their aspirations.
3. Be Of Interest.
To be interesting you must know what’s up. What’s up around your community, what’s up with your social circle, etc. If nothing is up, create your own events, invite people to do things. To go for a walk somewhere cool. To party, to explore, to hang out, to run, to take pictures, to make memories.
Now that you know how to turn strangers into friends. It's time to go out and do it. If you live your life waiting to be loved, love will come and go. But if you create love wherever you go, it will always be abundant.
Sometimes when you are running out of confidence you must take a retreat to get it back. Here are five types of confidence retreats:
1. Self Pep Talk.
This is the one you are likely most familiar with. You probably do it all the time. It's when you go into a bathroom to look in the mirror and start pep taking to yourself.
This one is done either in private or in the midst of chaos. Whether it'd be in the middle of the dance floor or on top of a rock at the Himalayas. Meditation allows you to tune out your surroundings and dive into your deeper desires.
3. Go for a walk.
You step out of your daily stress and experience the oxytocin and happiness surging through your body. You do this to forget about your daily struggles and create a more empowering mindset.
This might mean drawing, painting, singing, coding, writing, or any other creative superpower which you might posses. When we create we turn our imagination into reality. We become the innovators of our society.
5. Plug in your headphones.
Songs make you cry, they lift your spirits, they amp you up. Songs create a powerful effect throughout your whole body. The right song will boost your confidence to achieve whatever your desires may be.
6. Bonus: Play with kids
Kids are amazing. Just hanging out with them makes you feel as if you are capable of anything. They are the happiest people you will ever meet and are sure to boost your mood.